Is this common among all?

I got married 4 yrs back. no child yet. my husband was jobless for a few months 2yrs back and he did all sorts of things like pledging my jewels , making me believe he is in a job, and drinking habits etc . He doesn%26#039;t have any savings right from my marriage till date. I am also earning. After that incident we were separate for 1 month and he was advised not to repeat this. Then he got a job of less salary that time I was earning bit more than him taking care of most of the household expenses repaid the debts etc again he was in the drinking habit but I wasn%26#039;t aware of it bcoz I never got an inkling about it he always came late home he used the credit card to his wish and again there was debt I cleared it. after sometime I came to know that he is in the drinking habit and again we were separate for 2 months. he told me that he drank bcoz he was earning lesser than me. Now he has got a better job with better salary. But I am really hurt with all these incidents. and all these things are

Is this common among all?

It was a common thing that men get less salary than woman but its not common to drink for this reason if he is earning less salary then if U ill treated him then if he says that he drink then it was a common one if not it is not a common one.

Is this common among all?

This is not common But you need to be careful.

Is this common among all?

divorce him

that%26#039;s a lie to say he drank because you were earning more money

he drink because he likes to drink

and has a serious drinking problem

which should not be your problem

if you don%26#039;t file for divorce tomorrow morning

it will only get worse

and the debt will pile up

and you will be stuck holding the bill since you are the only %26quot;sane and sober%26quot; one in the dysfunctional relationship

Is this common among all?

It may be common with certain types of losers. Keep your eyes wide open. Keep your debt under control. Thankfully you have no children yet. Give it some time for him to prove himself better than he%26#039;s already shown you. Best Wishes!

Is this common among all?

People give various reasons for drinking... earlier your hubby said he drank because he had no job, then because he was earning less than you and now he would say he is earning sufficient.... there is no end to reasoning... if happy then drink, if sad then drink or stressed out drink....

I know that it would hurt you a lot... but you seem to have taken almost everything in your stride... hold out for some more time and try to reason with your hubby not to drink and save for the future and i sincerely hope it works out for you.

All the best in your life !!!!!!

Is this common among all?

well....do u luv him?do u feel it is worth if u give him onemore chance? can u make him realise the trauma u went through in those times and wud he fell sorry abt it? Wud he be able to give u the confidence that he wud keep uhappy? think of all this, find an answer, be true to urself and then decide ur further action. ALL THE BEST.

Is this common among all?

I%26#039;d say .. give him another chance with a WARNING that if he%26#039;s back to his bad habbits that he%26#039;ll be out of ur life for good and let him take care of the most household expenses and see if he can be a responsible husband .. when u run out of patience is the time when u r ready to leave him but u still have a little patience within u that%26#039;s why u posted a question here so remember .. one more chance with a serious warning

and PLZ dont make a baby at the moment

good luck

Is this common among all?

Don%26#039;t have a child with him, he is a loser, trying to blame you shame on him! Get rid of him now before this gets worse. If he is not willing to go to AA and stay sober, he is not worth your time! Alcololics always think it is someone else%26#039;s fault and have no problem blaming you or others for their drinking. Be strong and toss his butt and stuff out! Stick to your guns or things will be worse down the road..

Is this common among all?

he%26#039;s a drunk alocholic he needs help you cannot give him..... leave as he%26#039;s going to bleed the bank acc%26#039;s dry and your get hung with the bill from a booze hound..... who drinks 4 any reason..the silly man

Is this common among all?

Hi there, life does has its ups an downs,i hav learnt thus far on my brief journey on the planet, we allow people to either enpower us or them be enpowered,life has a wonderful way of showing us our weaknesses,and our strengths,make this an opportunity for you to stride ahead,everybody on the planet goes thru all sorts of dilemma%26#039;s and yes some are worse than others but its all relative,chin up move ahead.........someone once said nothing changes if nothing changes.........take care because i do really believe we are all connected,so wat do u want to change in your life to bring fufilment in it,its%26#039; your choice and your%26#039;s alone,till next time.......THE WIZARD

Is this common among all?

I would say to go to marriage counseling and to money counseling....and aa if that does not work then don%26#039;t let him have a card give him the amt. of money you think it is ok to spend....You have no choice...let him know that you will leave him and give hima month or 2 to change good luck honey..also try God, and chrch that works too...

Is this common among all?

this man seems to be a careless person. it is very hard for anybody to change his basic quality. and your husband is basically a selfish and careless man. if you decide to live with him your life is going to be full of thorns. each day u ll have to struggle to find yourself. i know divorce is not easy but i don%26#039;t find any other option........see yourself from someone else%26#039;s eyes.... don%26#039;t u feel pity for you?... would u like to spend your life like this?....would u like to be called a bechaari?... would you tolerate him for your entire life?.....think before expanding your family....

Is this common among all?

All the facts you mentioned here is nothing to do with any legal issue relating to your matrimonial life but since it relates to drinking habit of your husband so I thought let me share my life experience with you. I%26#039;m running my fiftieth year %26amp; have been married for almost 26 years. I have been taking alcoholic drinks regularly since my marriage time %26amp; even had habit of smoking. Although my wife never objected to my habits but she only told be occasionally to control both these habits. About two years back I simply stopped taking alcoholic drinks %26amp; till date I have not touched these even on any occasion. Similarly I stopped smoking a month back just like that %26amp; have not touched it till date. Both these habits one can leave only if he or she has willpower, which fortunately I had. I could only give up smoking after two years after I gave up alcoholic drinks as it took me two years to get guts %26amp; willpower to give it up. NO one even my doctor friends ever told me or forced me to leave both these, they only suggested sometimes %26amp; knew that I won%26#039;t give them up these, but now when they meet me %26amp; they are all surprised that a chain smoker %26amp; big boozer can give both these habits in one go. Tell my example to your husband, don閳ユ獩 force him just make up his mind %26amp; gain will power to get rid of this drinking habit, definately he will give up. My married daughter when came to know that I left both these habits was the most happiest person as she had seen me drinking %26amp; smoking through out her childhood. So best of luck days will change for you too.

Is this common among all?

Manage yourself to bring him in the right direction through your love and affection .

Is this common among all?

only you are the best judge to decide what to do with him

you loves him and this is why you are suffering

you can not stop your love for him but try to live without him and go for temporary separation

this will help you to analyse your situation and you will come to a decision to live with him or leave him

Is this common among all?

This problem is common among most of the middle-class indian women. Like one Tamil poet once said, %26quot;Robbery cannot be abolished, unless robber decides to quit%26quot; , are these drunken people. They cannot be put into right path unless they decide for a reformation. But putting them into right path is in the hands of person who are close and around him.

When we find things going out of our hand, it is high-time for us to take necessary steps to stop it. When social bond to stop his drinking habits fails its better to approach scientific method. You go for counselling. Take him to a good counsellor and let him go the treatment. Or else consult a good doctor, who can recommend you certain spray or medicine that makes the very taste of the liquor, sour.

If he does not abide by this... leave him with unconditionally and come to your home and leave separately. Let him repent and call you back. But keep a close eye on him.

Is this common among all?

No this is not common.. he is very irresponsible to a family life. Its real nice of you that you have handled all these so far for many years and worst of your time time and still has feeling to bring best of things in your married life. but he is not even trying to understand that. With so much hurt feeling i don%26#039;t think one can love a person so its all right not to feel love on him and also ti have hate feeling for him.. You cant boil your blood everyday on him so go for a drastic steps with ultimatums. You are independent women and just Tell him to behave like responsible man or else you don%26#039;t mind leaving him. but don%26#039;t accept any of his arguments as all he said does not make any sense.. all he does does not make any sense.. You are right in all ways and you have right to be happier than him..

Is this common among all?

He sounds like a total jerk!!!!

He seems to be a person who doesnt not take any responsibilty because he feels inferior to you since you are strong and have a mind of ur own. If your living a life of compromise then you have to rethink your life again. Do you love him so much that you dont mind bearing his stupidity for the rest of your life. Unless he shows some strong indications of change and some respect and consideration for you and your feelings, I feel you are compromising your life just for a social security of marriage.

I think women should not take such crap from men. Imagine how he would have reacted if you did not live up to his expectations...would be still with you??